If my Voice had Stayed the Same

That hug was the one we didn’t share
When I left you in the valleys.
Left you with the last of the primary days,
Without saying goodbye.

That hug was the ones we didn’t share,
Through all our high school days.
Frivolous almost non-hugs we’d have shared, not thinking.
Mornings,  nights,  in between lessons.

That hug was every happy birthday  we didn’t say,
For every one we nearly shared.
I’m still  older… you’ll still live longer.

That hug was all the ones we’d have had,
With every broken heart and crisis,
Every teenage trauma,
Every secret confided, every hardship shared.

That hug was every birth and marriage,
Every graduation, celebration.
Every giddy night out we’d have enjoyed-
If my voice had stayed the same.

That hug was 33 years.
That hug was so much more than a silent hug in a carpark.
That hug filled the non hugs of decades.

That hug stretches now,
A train track
From South to North.
And I’ll follow it back again,
Migration-like when the birds fly.
And in time you will too.

We didn’t say goodbye when we were ten.
Because we knew we’d meet again.